Surly's Soap Box

Life has been insane lately. Not only has it gotten cold out, (cold, as in single digits), but I have had to work 10 to 12 hour days, most of which has been, you guessed it, outside.

I just can't handle it anymore. I don't know how those guys who work outside year around can do it, but my hat is off to them. I just can't handle another day of multiple layers, cold breezes, and frost bite. I thought I'd acclimate, but it just ain't happening. Every year it gets harder to do, every year the joints ache more, the work is more exhausting, the cold gnaws a little deeper, it takes longer to warm up...

I didn't even plow out my driveway with the last round of snow because I just couldn't stand to be outside, to be cold...

So I'm exhausted when I get home, and then I'm busy most every night of the week with church activities. Now that I'm officially installed as an elder at my church, there are added meetings and responsibilities, which I could handle if work wasn't killing me. The nights I don't have anything going, I just crash in front of the computer, too fried to blog (which is when I should post about politics), or I pass out on the couch.

Today, I had a touch of some sort of stomach bug, and decided that it was enough of a nuisance to stay home. While I feel guilty about not going to work, part of me is like, "screw 'em". While the stomach bug is a legit excuse for not standing in the middle of a frozen, snow covered, wind swept parking lot installing signs, part of me feels bad for not toughing it out. I do have a strong work ethic, but if you've ever had to use a porta-potty in 5 degree weather, well, you'd probably make the same decision.

My wife keeps asking me if I'm depressed, but I think I'm just worn down. I need to recharge, to get out with some friends and do some thing different. But every time I make plans, something comes up, whether it be work or home. Heck, I wouldn't know know what to do with myself if I found myself in a purely social environment. It'd probably take me a couple hours to unwind, or at least a couple beers.

It's probably just the season though. The short days, the busyness of the end of the years stuff. I don't personally get caught up in the commercialization of the Christmas season, but I do get dragged into the rush of it. Not that we as a family unit get crazy with the shopping and all that, but the end of the year is generally insane for all.

Perhaps when January rolls around I'll be able to find some balance, but for now I'll take a long week end and hop back on the train Monday morning. Bundled up and working on a roof top in North St. Paul. Joy. At least it's supposed to be in the 30°s.